actual cutie ren
oh my god this took six hours i’m so sorry (and thank you for the compliment djfklfdjdflkdlskjs)
CAT’S EXTREMELY QUICK GUIDE TO BANGING OUT A REALLY FUCKING LONG PAPER
- if you have a choice in paper topic pick something you really like? i mean you don’t always, but if there is something you genuinely care about, you can probably talk about it for ages
- once you’ve picked your topic: do a fuckton of research. do research for a solid 4 straight hours. take notes. is your information relevant? who cares? is it going to be useful? who the fuck knows? write down EVERYTHING.
- congratulations, you now have EVIDENCE, and every good paper is driven by evidence! it’s helpful to have your evidence handwritten, so you can look at it and take notes on it; spread it out in front of you, find surprising connections and patterns, find obvious connections and patterns, think about the implications of every little detail.
- write down your ideas. write down all the patterns; write down all the connections; write down all the implications.
- think about how your patterns and connections and implications could be best organized to make a fun story! this is literally what essays are, no one is going to tell you this, but it’s basically “once upon a time there was a thing, thing was A, therefore thing was B, therefore thing was C, and thing all lived happily ever after (or died)!”
- okay now get a bunch more patterns and connections and implications and write them down AGAIN and organize them into a story AGAIN.
- think about how the two stories relate to each other! they are probably part of a greater whole, i.e., your topic! mush them together into a seamless huger story!
- repeat as many times as necessary to have an outline that is VERY LONG
- get a damn good 8tracks playlist, once you find the Perfect Essay-Writing 8Tracks Playlist it is like finding your future spouse
- plug your headphones in. get something caffeinated. find a comfortable place to curl up. make sure none of your friends want to talk to you for the next few days.
- self-control!!!!! i tend to do it in 75-minute segments because that is about the amount of time i can concentrate w/o becoming ineffective.
- prepare yourself to become intimately acquainted with four in the morning.
- become intimately acquainted with four in the morning.
- once it is written, do not look at it for another 24 hours. don’t. DON’T.
- go over it! realize your ideas are shit! make them less shit! realize they are deeply disorganized! organize them!
- last of all, correct typos, clarify language, add sparkles, add a visual aid if you want one, make sure everything is glittery
- send it in!
- never, ever, ever think about it again!
In health class we were given sheets of paper and told to write a message we would want someone of the opposite sex to know
She read some examples
The girls were like: “Hey can you please not treat me like shit”
The boys were like: “Spray tans look ugly I hate when girls wear too much makeup and don’t lead me on.”
I may act like I’m sassy but if you’re mean to me there is a 900% chance I’ll cry
"Baby be the class clown
I’ll be the beauty queen in tears
It’s a new art form showing people how little we care (Yeah)
We’re so happy, even when we’re smilin’ out of fear
Let’s go down to the tennis court, and talk it up like yeah (Yeah)”
A faculty member at Minneapolis Community and Technical College, Shannon Gibney, received a formal reprimand for her handling of a discussion about structural racism in her Introduction to Mass Communication course.
According to Gibney inan interview with City College News, a white male student asked her, “Why do we have to talk about this in every class? Why do we have to talk about this?”
She claims she was shocked, because “[h]is whole demeanor was very defensive. He was taking it personally. I tried to explain, of course, in a reasonable manner — as reasonable as I could given the fact that I was being interrupted and put on the spot in the middle of class — that this is unfortunately the context of 21st century America.”
Gibney says another white male student followed the first, saying “Yeah, I don’t get this either. It’s like people are trying to say that white men are always the villains, the bad guys. Why do we have to say this?”
When Gibney attempted, again, to inform the students that they were mistaking a systemic critique for a personal attack, the students continued to argue. Eventually, she told them that “if you’re really upset, feel free to go down to legal affairs and file a racial harassment discrimination complaint.” This is exactly what they did.
Gibney is familiar with white male students taking discussions about structural racism as personal attacks, as it has happened before: ina 2009 incident, an editor of the school newspaper took offense at a similar discussion. In both that case and this one, Gibney received an official reprimand. After the latest accusation, the Vice President of Academic Affairs appended a letter to her file, in which he said he found it “it troubling that the manner in which you led a discussion on the very important topic of of structural racism alienated two students who may have been most in need of learning about this subject.”
“While I believe it was your intention to discuss structural racism generally,” he continued, “it was inappropriate for you to single out white male students in class. Your actions in [targeting] select students based on their race and gender caused them embarrassment and created a hostile learning environment.”
Gibney told lawyers at an investigatory meeting for an anti-discrimination lawsuit she and six other professors are filling against MCTC that the vice president’s words “have helped those three white male students succeed in undermining my authority as one of the few remaining black female professors here.”
There’s a lot of irony in this story. In the students’ subsequent freak out about feeling “singled out” about structural racism they went over her head and tried to get the professor fired…indicating structural racism.